For years I struggled with the fear of losing someone that I loved. The insecurity of being left behind. I felt powerless in every relationship because I was putting my all in others before myself. Can you relate?

As the years passed I realized two very powerful things:

  1. You can’t control what others think, feel or choose. So being conditioned by it is the worst thing you can do for yourself or your relationship
  2. Loving someone should be a partnership that is enjoyed everyday. Without less hopes for the future and more well lived moments in the now

But how can you really be secure and confident in a relationship with someone else?

All relationships count

You are more than the sum of your actions and thoughts, the people around you influence who you become. Choose consciously and wisely who you decide to have around you. Even when you don’t notice it, they leave something of them in you. 

If you know who you want to become, make sure you have the right people around you to get there.

Loving someone else before yourself can be dangerous

When you choose that special someone to love more than others, remember to love yourself first. Having someone to support us can give security and tranquility in the future. But not depending on someone gives us freedom of choice, confidence of ability and purpose of action.

A lasting relationship is one where you learn to love yourself first and then invite someone to share it with. Before starting a new relationship or giving up on your current one, love yourself as much as you want someone to.

The most difficult yet powerful person to love

It may seem difficult to maintain a relationship with yourself but it will be worthwhile to do so. Becoming your best friend, your best client, your best support will empower you in your path ahead. It will bring you at least 4 powerful things:

  1. Confidence in yourself, 
  2. Courage to pursue your dreams, 
  3. Certainty of your next step, 
  4. Freedom to live your life your way.

The right mindset counts in every relationship

What can you do when you love yourself but everyone else seems to disregard you? Stop waiting for people to treat you how you want… Educate them to treat you how you deserve!

People learn to treat you the way you let them. The same way a child will try your boundaries, so will every adult you encounter. Which means you have to stay strong and teach them how to treat you. 

Love yourself first, choose with whom you want to share it and then fight for the kind of relationships you want and deserve.